I feel bad, completely antisocial and grumpy. Today I blew off a couple of social invitations. Both of which would be fun. Not to mention hurt my Mom’s feelings, insulted boy scouts, and am currently missing Ian’s awards ceremony that I really should be at. Ostracized my family, and proceeded to be a total bitch. Spent the major part of the day dwelling on my Spanish oral (Monday) and not getting any of it done. I am upset with Sra. Flores for not helping us with them. She’s all, well you should know how to do this now… HELL NO! That’s why I’m taking the class… Not to mention I have zero confidence on this thing, much less in my Spanish-speaking ability. Honestly it really isn’t all that much. All I can conceivably prepare is the first 3 min the rest is out of my control. It’s like I’m back in middle school all over again. I remember why I was never a happy middle schooler. I used to have anxiety attacks. Stupid shit like this. Today I didn’t even goof off, and at least make the most of working hard at not working. I kinda restlessly roamed the house, tried to read a bit, tried to surf the internet, tried to eat some food, tried to sleep in. I couldn’t even sleep in today I just woke up at 7 on my own. I haven’t been eating right. All I had today was a little cold pizza for breakfast. No appetite to speak of.
Not to mention I am a horrible sister who is missing Ian’s scout arrow of light graduation ceremony right now. I was all I don’t wanna go. I don’t like scouts. (both parents nail in heart) So they left without me. I am such an ass. Hungry, but I just don’t feel like eating. Not that there is anything there to eat.
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